A New Zealand expat has ripped into the culture of dating in Australia, saying that men Down Under stand out internationally for the wrong reason.
A New Zealand expat has unleashed on dating culture in Australia, saying that Aussie men stand out around the world for putting minimal effort into dating.
Madi Rouse, who describes herself online as an accidental relationship expert, posted to TikTok that she has spoken to women across the world who all said the same thing about dating Aussie men.
“Australian men have a lot of work to do, and I say this with love,” she said.
“We have no model of excellence.”
Rouse described what she sees as a cycle of men putting little effort into dating, which has led to Aussie women coming to accept that as the standard.
“In America, the bar for how a man pursues a woman is just higher,” Rouse said.
“Not because American men are better but because the culture expects more and the competition enforces that.
“Men over there have to show up, plan dates, put in real effort because if they don’t, someone else will,” she said.
Rouse described the standard in Australia as “so low that no one has to try”.
“Because no one has to try, no one expects it,” she said.
Madi Rouse said that Aussies have no model of excellence in dating. Picture: TikTok @yourfree_therapy.
Rouse said that American met put more effort in because they have to. Picture: TikTok @yourfree_therapy.
Her TikTok viewers mostly agreed with her, with one user writing that “there’s almost no dating culture anymore”.
“In Melbourne there’s almost no dating culture anymore, lots of chatting, ghosting, and ‘situationships’, but very little actual asking someone out,” they wrote.
“When I spent a few weeks in Europe, men approached respectfully and asked for proper dates.
“It wasn’t creepy, it was normal. I think a lot of good men here are also being told that showing initiative is ‘simping’, or ‘I’m independent, I can do it myself’ while a lot of women still appreciate effort and men taking the lead. Somewhere along the way the middle got lost.”
Another viewer compared it to her experience in other countries too, writing that she had “lived in England, New Zealand and Australia, and English men put so much more effort in.”
Others however argued that this is not a problem specific to men only, with users writing that it “goes both ways”.
“You must first blame the dating environment. Stop blaming each other,” one user wrote.
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